The
Pantomime seasonbegan early at Ravenhill
on Friday night with Mike Blair starring
as the principal boy and Mark Bartholomeusz
making a repeat appearance as the Evil Villain. (If
only we could combine Bryn's defence and Bart's attack!).
The Ugly Sisters, Mustchin and Maxwell,
(sorry boys)
made a welcome return to the Belfast stage with plenty
of pantomime booing from the home crowd. Referee David
Rose entered the spirit of things as the Old Dame eliciting
cries of , "Oh no it isn't!" and, "Behind
you!" from the boisterous home crowd.
It all started so well with Ulster "up
and at 'em"
(naughty , naughty!) early
on!
However a few "dropped balls" (ooh
err missus!) and "forward
passes"(silly
boys!)
from the support cast soon led to the visiting players
getting the "upper hand"(careful
now!).
As the Ulster players went into their now customary slapstick
comedy routine Edinburgh went about stealing the points
as quickly as Goldilocks could wolf down a bowl of porridge.
Ulster tried to play it deadpan in the
second half but by that stage the Wicked Stepmother had
already made of with the "crown jewels!"(Ouch!)
David Pollock gets The
FRU MotM award.
You
always know its been a scrappy match when you get several
different nominations for The FRU Man of The Match award.
Unfortunately this week was particularly scrappy and we
have four nominations with Kieron Dawson,
Andrew Trimble and Paddy Wallace
all getting a vote.
It is annoying that
there are still good individual displays within this
team which are then wasted by an abject lack of teamwork
and basic skills. The fleeting glimpse of coherent play
in the first ten minutes just made the next twenty harder
to stomach! Someday it'll click and some team will get
a hammering, let's just hope it's sooner rather than
later!
Back to the matter in hand,
(oh-er!)The FRU Man of the Match goes to David
Pollock for his tireless display(harumph!)
throughout the 80 minutes.
Picture from Ulster Rugby.
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In The News.
The
Ulster Rugby publicity machine was working
overtime this weekend with three stories in the local
BBC coverage on the net.
The first story takes the form of a weather warning
following the huge wave of depression that swept out
of Ravers on Friday night.
The effects of this wave were felt in Cork and Donegal
to the south and north but strangely enough Galway and
Dublin in the east and west were left untouched!!
Though a safety warning was issued it is thought that
the effects of the wave dissipated quickly under a tide
of Guinness!
After showing no interest in rugby since the visit
of Ireland and Italy to Ravenhill, prior to the Rugby
World Cup, it looks as though Belfast Lord Mayor, Jim
Rodgers, has decided it's time to jump back on the bandwagon.
Unfortunately Mr Rodgers appears to have let his penchant
for political rhetoric get the better of him and his
condemnation of the "beating" by
Edinburgh seems a bit extreme.
Don't worry Jim, you don't need to concern yourself
about getting to grips with the game, as all the big
games will soon be moved to the City of Lisburn.
It's doubtful if DCAL Supremo, and self styled "Worshipful"
Lord Mayor of Lisburn, Edwin Poots will be inviting
you along to his new playground.
Things just haven't got any better for "cute
and cuddly" Ulster Rugby supremo Mike Reid
according to this story on Friday.
It seems that Mike was hoping to follow the advice
of one Mr Cockatrice and two Mr Deadballs who had advised
him to tape any abuse directed at him at future matches.
However after getting wind of this the Lord Chief Justice
said that monitoring of such conversations will be unlawful
and advised instead that Mike should just give the mouthy,
immature, petulant morons a good smack on the chops
next time they think paying £15 entitles them
to act in a threatening manner!
Ed. Having overheard
some of these prats on Friday, as I happened to follow
Mike Reid out under the stand, I'd suggest a smack on
the chops would do them the world of good.
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News
from the Colonies
In
order to know more about the girls from
Milwaukee, The FRU sent out an intensive questionnaire
and personality profile to determine just what type
of girls will be visiting our dear shores.
We'll be reproducing the results over
the next few weeks, culminating with a classification
of "Fruette" or
"Players Wife".
Below is the first of the series.
Question 1. (Sordid Past) Are you now,
or have you ever been, a Cheerleader?
Unfortunately for Holywoodmike only four of the 27
girls who replied (15%) have admitted to being cheerleaders.
The girls with no shame are (top
left to bottom right)Meghan Hausman,
Rebecca Headley, Kati McCormick
and Aimee Uher.
Fortunately Coach Jeff and Coach Scot
declined to answer!
Question
2. (Musical Taste) Who do you prefer, Daniel O'Donnell
or Snow Patrol?
An overwhelming majority of the girls
(92%) plumped for Snow Patrol so their taste in music
is not too bad.
However one brave soul, Brittany
Houston (left) did express a strong preference
for Daniel - so it looks like a night out in Donegal for
Brittany then! (Maybe she'll get a wee cup of tea as well!)
Question 3. (Social Skills) Which drink
do you prefer, Guinness or Harp?
A strong preference for Guinness amongst the girls
(63%), but there looks to be a fair proportion of lager
louts amongst the traveling party. Look out Weatherspoons
in Carrick.
The angelic looking captain of the team, Megan
Schultz (right) expressed a liking for neither.
She did say that she likes plenty of gin and vodka though,
so that's OK.
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Rooster and Youngman the standouts
this week with two points each!
Week 13. Heineken Cup
Weekend Friday 7th December 2007.
Leinster v Edinburgh
Ospreys v Ulster
Bourgoin v Gloucester
Treviso v Dragons
Clermont Auvergne v Wasps
Harlequins v Bristol
Saracens v Viadana
Leicester v Toulouse
Llanelli v Munster
Glasgow v Biarritz
London Irish v Perpignan
Stade Francais v Cardiff
Three groups of four.
Bonus point for each correctly predicted group.
Predictions to be in by 6:00pm Friday 7th December 2007.
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